We've been in the hospital for a long time now....

Things I have learned

1)      What Urate crystals are – I can tell you it’s REALLY fun to have to ask the question at 3am…

2)      That my sense of humor (mostly about poo and fart jokes) is more applicable now than ever

3)      The term : “Poo-nami” (thanks Susannah & Neil)

Poo-Nami

      1.      –noun

Usually, a giant poo that your child has made that takes you by surprise

4)      We really love “Big Jugs” (the person, not in general)

5)      As we have started looking into the Bris, we’re pretty sure that Samson is dealing with the stress by emotionally eating. Clearly nothing to do with normal baby progression.

6)      That at 3am, when your child has been feeding for pretty much 3 hours non-stop, you can find all sorts of solace on the internet from other sleep deprived people writing about their own harrowing nights. You learn about weird things like Cluster feeding and growth spurts. In the end all you’re really thinking is: I think Sammy eats like me – as much as possible because it tastes good as opposed to stopping when he’s full. Crap.

Important statistics we are keeping track of:

1)      Number of times a nurse walked in and said that the doctor will take Samson for his circumcision at 2pm: 1 (What if we were sleeping?!?!?!)

2)      Number of times Danielle has started a sentence with “if you’d read the Baby Whisperer….”: 5

3)      Amount of minutes it took me to skim the baby whisperer at 4am with a crying child: 25

4)      Number of times the room service people have delivered a meal (barging in) when Danielle is breast feeding: every time. Without fail. I think it’s a game for them now.

5)      2 words: one wiper. 1.

6)      First record listened to: Billy Joel, The Stranger

7)      Number of times I was typing an email and fell asleep with my finger on the letter “o” which looked like: “oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo” (this really happened, but brons and shai – I’m sure you can see even deeper humor)

Pictures for your amusement

Self Explanatory

Mighty Samson Roars (or yawns)

Live coverage of a Poo-nami (or another yawn. you decide)

Pantalones Gorditos

The First 24...

Little Samson Kroo is simply amazing and adjusting (reasonably well to the new environment.) He's a very calm baby that never cries for long (I'm sure I'm jinxing this). He seems to like us as parents which is nice  - though he has not verbalized this yet, one can assume. Danielle feeds him. I wipe his butt and burp him. What else is there? oh - the swaddle.....

Important stats that we are keeping track of:


1) Hours slept since 8am April 22: probably 8

2) # Times Samson farted in my hand: 1 per parent (and it was awesome)

3) # times Samson pooed in a nurses hand (big time!) as she changed him: 1

4) # times I managed to be out of the room when a nurse changed a diaper: 2 (but I've gotten my fair share since)

5) # Number of times a nurse said "sharted": 1. and yes, it was hilarious.

6) # of times we were visited by the nurse they call "Big Jugs": 1 (and it is true)

7) # times I thought about how crazy I am for writing this instead of sleeping?: 4. exactly.

In all seriousness, everyone here has been awesome and the first 30 hours of Samson's young life have been incredible to be a part of.

Pictures for you amusement:

He really takes after Danielle as an excellent napper. Or he's a newborn baby. Either way....

Space pod bed, How I missed thee....

The Thinker.

Proof that all babies look somewhat like Winston Churchill

Last night's complementary dinner. This looks like prison food except worse. But it is Kosher for Passover....

(For the Luft/Kroo  family) Dinner included party beets!

We've forgotten (sort of) about the last 36 hours....

It is totally worth it...

October 10, 2010

December 10, 2010

March 3 2011

April 23, 2011

Yes, we are still here....

27.5 hours into our stay and we are having a blast (if you can call it that).Danielle is holding up like Rocky vs. Ivan Drago.

Important statistics we are tracking:


1) Number of times I gave Danielle a drink of water when I was not supposed to and received a scolding from the nurse: 1 (but she looked thirsty!)

2) # of times  nurse told me I look like Steve Carrell: 1 (and she never came back - Esther?)

3) # of times I've snuck out to have food so as not to anger a hungry pregnant woman: 3 (Note: Passover in hospitals - not fun)

4) # of times a nurse told me that I looked like I was in as much pain as Danielle, with great mockery: 1

5) # of times Danielle said "everyone should get an epidural!": at least 5

6) # of panicked phone calls I made to Shai saying "holy shit!" : 1 (see: epidural)

7) # of people that have come in after us and had babies already: too many to count. And it's really pissing Danielle off.

Things I've learned:

- Water breaking does not equal a nice puddle of water (let's leave it at that)
- Words cannot describe the things I'm hearing from next door. I'm happy to be a man.

Pictures for your amusement:

I told Danielle this was an anal thermometer (it's not). She was not amused.

We've passed the 26 hour mark

Putting this back on may have been premature - I've suppose I've worn the same unwashed clothes for longer periods in my life....

I've been trained to expect yelling at the spikes. I am now an expert in reading these. Big spike = lots of cursing. I should have been a doctor.

I have now eaten 4 lbs of Israeli salad (thanks Carrie!) - I love passover....

I can post this frequently because nothing is happening

We are now at hour 19.5 since we arrived at the hospital - Danielle is so good at labor that she's had consistent contractions but did not even know it....Still a long wait to go. Therefore: Post #2.

Important statistics we are tracking:

1) # of times a random nurse has come in and said "I am covering for Esther": at least 4. Who is this Esther? Did she win a bet? She's like the polkeroo (Canadian reference). Wiki link included because I asked Danielle if she'd heard of that and she looked at me like I was on crack.

link 1: Polka dot door wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polka_Dot_Door
link 2: Polkaroo video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghWpAgFfgV0

2) # of times I asked Danielle what was happening in the soap shows she was making me watch: 8. Many people kept coming back to life.

3) Shesh Besh scores: Danielle 1, Josh 1

4) # of times Danielle openly admitted to cheating in her shesh besh victory: 1

5) # of really bad farts that I ripped right before a doctor came in: 1

6) # of times the doctor assumed it was Danielle while I chuckled on the other side of the room: 1

7) # of times a happy smiley doctor said "this could take days!" while chuckling: 1. Danielle did her best to not throw something at her.

8) # of things that a doctor has said that make my jaw drop and want to laugh hysterically: 1. But danielle won't let me write what it was.

That's it, that's all: We will keep you posted (or feel free to delete....)

Danielle and Josh

Pictures for your amusement:

Had to change my shirt temporarily so the Giants shirt will be fresh for tomorrow. In case the baby magically shoots out, at least it will see MSU. I thought maybe a McGill Redmen shirt but Danielle wouldn't allow that.

148 beats per minute....this kid is getting a workout! sometimes it goes up to 170.

For those that have lived, traveled, or seen my apartment, you know that when I go somewhere I can expand like a vapor. Why should the delivery room be any different.

This is me decimating Danielle at Shesh Besh. She rolled 3 double fives in a row and may have been more upset about that than all the waiting....

The Waiting Game

Hour 16.5 in the hospital: Nothing happening yet....I did get to sleep in a pull out bed that reminds me of the spacepod bathroom in our bedroom though. It also affords me the time to start a blog....

Things I have learned:
1) 1 long beep = blood pressure. I can call a nurse and they will say don't worry.

2) 3 beeps = no nurse coming for a while, me getting anxious (but not saying it because danielle is sleeping) and then a nurse coming to tell me 3 beeps means that the cardio monitor for the baby ran out of paper.

3) Pregnant ladies are constantly hot, so the temperature in this room rivals that of the fortress of solitude in the north pole. Only Ton Tons and a pregnant woman could survive here.

4) I am useless, but nurses are still sort of nice to you while making jokes about my having done this to Danielle.

5) Everytime Danielle is nice to me, I know she's building up some credit for the horrible things she'll yell at me later. I know this because she told me.

Important Statistics we will track:

1) # times a nurse has asked Danielle if she wants a bedpan: 2

2) # of times Danielle has chosen to not use a bed pan and hold it in: 2

3) # of hours since we arrived at the hospital: 16

4) Number of veins that "blew" while nurses were putting in the IV

5) Centimeters dilated: 1.5

6) # of showers in our room that do not work: 1



Photos for your amusement:

Induction process begins at 10:30pm - 2.5 hours into our stay

A little exploring uncovered this "fun" bin. Don't worry - not in use....yet.

Space pod bed where I get to sleep.

Careful Planning as we were rushing out of the house dictated that this should be the first thing Baby K sees.....

10:30am. Nothing doing. I can no longer feel my extremities but Danielle is quite comfortable with the temperature.