Sammy has a very strategic approach to his toys. I caught him Hiding toys behind his bed like a prison inmate hides a weapon so that when he goes to bed he has toys. Last night walked in and he was playing with
his tools "daddy, I'm learning tools."
According to the internet kids are always in sleep regressions. There is a sleep regression period for every month in which your kid wakes up randomly in the middle of the night. Really. Solace, bye bye.
It's an intriguing game Danielle and I play. Depending on whose side of the
bed Sammy comes to in the AM, one of us is inevitably trying to get him to
wake up the other.
[written on Feb 8] It's my birthday. And I'm sitting in a car while Samson naps - not willing
to risk him having a bad nap. Note: my birthday is no longer mine.
to risk him having a bad nap. Note: my birthday is no longer mine.
So I had drake stuck in my head the other day. The song "started from the bottom..". I was singing it to Sammy
figuring he's find it catchy. Oops: "daddy, that song is not good. I like old McDonald."
figuring he's find it catchy. Oops: "daddy, that song is not good. I like old McDonald."
Sammy told me a story the other day. It involved a Caterpillar that turned into a butterfly then into a fat butterfly and then into a big big baby
Sammy loves sports jerseys. I thought it was super cool until he found a gift he was given as a baby. A Montreal Canadiens jersey. Now he won't take it off and I'm crying tears of sadness every day...
So potty training is going great. The only potty training hiccup is the pants pull up. I knew we had some work to do when he asked is my penis inside?"
So potty training is going great. The only potty training hiccup is the pants pull up. I knew we had some work to do when he asked is my penis inside?"
You know you're a parent when you think your phone just vibrated but in
reality, it was just your kid sitting in your lap and farting.
reality, it was just your kid sitting in your lap and farting.
Apparently, for our kids, daylight savings comes two weeks early? WTF? No one gave us that memo.
So Sammy rarely plays with Lily, so when he doe, Danielle and I are ecstatic. Except for that time that they took a bath together and Sammy basically (much to Lily's pure joy) water boarded her. You'd think she would mind him covering her face with a wet rag and then dumping water on her. But she thought it was hilarious and loved every minute. Go figure....
Josh: Sammy say sorry
Sammy: (Whispering) sorry
Josh: Sammy, say it in your big boy voice
Sammy: "sorry in my big boy voice"
On pizza toppings
Danielle: Sammy, what do you want in your pizza?
Sammy: chocolate
On who's boss:
Danielle: Sammy, it's too early to get up, please try to sleep a little
longer or you will be tired.
Sammy: mommy, I have a choice to stay in bed or get up. I want to get up.
Josh: Ummmm....
On choosing music:
Sammy: We don't like that song. AT ALL.
On names:
"Daddy, can you call me josh today?"
On who will be listening to who:
"Mommy, tomorrow I'm going to listen to myself. Only to me. (read: not you, mom and dad)"
On having an opinion
Danielle: do you want to cuddle with me, Sammy?
Sammy: I think I'll cuddle with my dad instead
On positive reinforcement:
When one of his friends that was over put on her own shoes Sammy informed her: "that was very nice. I'm proud of you"
On Fear:
Kenia: Sammy I'm going to eat you up!
Sammy: no Kenia! That's scary! Eat real things like I do
Wishful thinking:
Sammy: "Daddy, Mom went to shul and she going invite the rabbi to our house for dinner!!"
On Mis-hearing:
Sammy: I'm sassy.
Josh (to Danielle) : What? did he just say sexy?
Sammy: I'm sassy.
Josh: Oh.....sassy!
On clearly articulating our feelings:
Sammy: I'm angry because I asked you for the card and you said not now
On NO:
Sammy: When I say no I say no
On supervision:
Danielle: Sammy, I have to go feed lily
Sammy: How will I color without a grown up?
My librarian:
Sammy: Daddy, I have some good books for you to read.
Sometimes it's not good enough to the be the rabbi or the cantor of our shul...
Sammy: Daddy, today i'm the president. The rabbi is praying and the cantor is sleeping. We have to do a speech. Shhh. Be quiet.
On....oh...whatever:
I'm going to pee (closes door, then peeks his head out). I need some
privacy.
On who's boss, part 2:
After climbing into our bed at 2am following a nightmare
Sammy: "mommy, there's no room. Can you please go to the couch?"
On future career paths:
You know you're kid is religious when the rabbi comes up to you can
suggests you put a down payment for JTS (jewish theological seminary" at
the age if 2)
Words we learn at school
[after throwing his underwear behind the couch] "Kenia, it's hibernating."
What you say when you are surprised
"Holy canoli!"
On what Danielle and I should get him
"Mommy, you should have another baby. In April." (Sorry Sammy - you will not be getting this)
On his preference for plans
First we should go to the bronx burger house. Then we should go to
menchies. If bronx burger house is open, then we can go there. If it's
closed we can't. Does that sound like a plan?
On the value of money
I don't want to drop my penny because then it will get ruined and I can't
buy anything.
Josh: what are you going to buy?
Sammy: I'm going to buy a hockey rink
On driving
"Are we there yet? This is taking a really long time."
On Martin Luther King Day
Sammy: can you take me to the birthday party?
Danielle: who's having a birthday party today?
Sammy: Martin junior
Danielle: who? You have a friend named Martin?
Sammy: Martin King junior!
Danielle: ooooh! What should we do for his birthday?
Sammy: cupcakes and cake!!!
On teaching, Sort of:
Josh: Sammy, will you teach lily how to speak?
Sammy: yes
Josh: will you teach her the words you know?
Sammy: yes, I will.
Josh: what words we you teach her?
Sammy: I'll have to think about it
Message, not received
Danielle: what happens when you whine?
Sammy: I get a yes
Danielle: ummm, no.
On love
Danielle: Samson, I love you
Samson: oh that's so nice of you mommy! I love you too
On being busy
Danielle: Sammy do you want to read with me?
Sammy: no thanks I'm playing with my dad now.
When your kids just make you melt...
Sammy: daddy, are you going to stay with me while I take a nap?
Josh: yes Sammy
Sammy: that makes me feel happy!
On timing
Sammy: daddy, I have to go because I'm going to be late for a hockey game
On who is really the boss...
Mommy, shhh. Stop talking. It's quiet time now.
On understanding people
(About his Bubby) she's a good person.
On recaps
Josh: (asking about the 20 minute meltdown I endured): What happened?
Sammy: We got in a little fight
No words for this one...
"I don't apologize. I'm a man."
Or this one....
"I'm a man, I ride the swing this way."
See ya...
"Adios, mommy"
Pictures for your amusement
Ton-Ton Lily |
Hello nebulizer. |
Besties |
We officially have a daughter. |
Besties part 2 |
Naked baby eating time (or, a picture that will likely embarrass lily later in life) |
Are we not using this right? |
Ethan and Lily. Courtship. |
This is kind of like those tough guys in bars that can pull of a beer bottle cap with their teeth? good party trick! |
Monster from the deep (of the bath) |
Baby on Baby violence. |
Besties part 3: Lily, this is called Ella's personal space. |
Lily upstanding personal space. Also, there are lots of babies here - but really you should focus in on the leg rolls... |
Learning from Roger korman, Zen master |
Baby Lily and Baby Tali. Forever they shall be called baby because they are second children. |
Korman and Kroo ladies |
Attention from BIG kids makes us happy....even when they treat you like a doll |
Ethan and Lily. courtship apparently going well... |
Nothing to do with the Kids. But Danielle would like you all to know she is besties with Allan Houston. |
Meeting of the minds |
Nebulizer part 2. This is less than fun. |
Babies in winter = funny. |
Attack of the Lily Monster |
ummm..... |
So when Lily was younger she did this tongue thing... |
Sabbah Rabbah meets Lily |
Love at first sight |
Samson and Ezra, just two buddies having some quality time together. |
the old....change your baby's diaper in the car trick... |
He reminds of ferris beuller here for some reason. |
Future rabbi. Grover went through an orthodox conversion |
So did cookie Monster |
Lily, that is not very ladylike. I know you didn't like dinner but... |
Nora is quite tolerant of Sammy's shenanigans.... |
The family that poops together... Lily is happy to provide moral support. |
So this is food. It goes in your mouth. Sometimes. |
Sabbah and Lily ready for shul |
On the super rare, once in a lifetime occasion, Sammy gets to paint the walls. |
Pre water boarding |
Caleigh and Sammy hiding and waiting to surprise Naama at the Museum |
Sammy and Naama awkward kid-hug when seeing each other (note: This was unprompted I think!) |
One of these kids is taller than the others... |
In the "touch" area of the museum. So this probably has lice, right? |
These jerseys fit perfectly! |
So Lily got the Plague. And that plague landed on me. |
Sammy wearing a Canadiens jersey all the time is insanely depressing. Where did I go wrong???? |
Plague part 2. |
Look closely at what is happening here. I didn't at the time. |
5 minutes later.... |
Baby boot camp - successful. |
Two dapper men.... |
One naked baby having dinner pre-wedding (can't ruin the dress!) |
Lily and Bubby pre-wedding |
For good measure... |
Sabbah and Lily |
Living out his Hora dream...Not to mention staying up until 10pm |
Post-wedding coma |
Kenia and her kiddos |
Lily has a way with older men (or boys) |
Purim - Mets player (sans pants, I guess) |
Baby Gymnastics |
Someone is a ham for the camera |
Sammy and "beeb" (Aviv) walk to the park |
"Don't F**K with me. Or else..." |
Cool kids use 4 straws. To backwash. |
Our band. |
Muscle baby. Our living room is like Lily's venice beach. |
Someone learned how to sit up on their own and then promptly fell asleep. |
Just a couple of dudes, cruising the park picking up....well, just cruising the park |
You've got to take turns driving this bad boy... |
Lily gets professional entertainment from the comedy writer |
Singing Frozen.... |
Videos for your amusement
Typical Sammy, Lily interaction
Things that make you happy...